Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Lots of stuff

$DEITY it's late. Not so much the hour as the time. Since it's been a while I thought I'd throw up (upchuck?) a quick update.

I need to post my comments on the Brazilian Grand Prix. The summery is that Fernando Alonso came in third but won the drivers championship to become the youngest driver champion in GP history. He'd just turned 24 a short while ago. God how I hate young kids. :-P

I did get setup to start acupuncture in a few days. What the hell, can't hurt. Been weaning off of the meds as much as possible. Got one down (Elavil) and am starting on a second (Ultram). They also found that I have some fairly non-trivial arthritis in my neck at C2 & C3. Now I know why I can't turn my head as far as it used to go.

I'm going to call the shrink and make an appointment with the therapist. I don't know if I'm depressed or not (Wellbutrin ROCKS!) but I'm having a seriously difficult time keeping my thoughts straight. I can't stop obsessing over Asian women and women's feet (especially Asian womens feet). Yes, I have what normally is a healthy foot fetish (just like looking; no stomping or other stuff) but now I'm going out of my way to try and spot even the slightest flash of a woman in sandals or barefoot. With winter coming I'm going to be without for a while. It's almost as bad with Asian women.

Part of that might be due to the fact that any potential long-term relationship with my Chinese girlfriend has evaporated to 0.001% now. She'd be all for it if I were rich or even just had a job with a fair income. I can't see me finding any woman of any race, creed or color at this point. I fail all cost/benefit analysis's. Old, broken-down cripple-boy with no job, high debt and a young son. Oh yea, if I were a single professional woman I'd be just begging to get it on with someone like me.

My son is the one bright spot in the universe. He is doing much better in grade 3 this year. Still having trouble keeping quiet and controlling his impulses but no where near what 2nd grade was like.

There's much more but I'm to tired to remember anything else. All I need is a break. Just one small break and I could start rebuilding. But the only break in my future is the ground cracking to swallow me up whole.

"What do you do when your falling you've got 30 degrees and your stalling out
And its 24 miles to the beacon there's a crack in the sky and the warnings out"
[...]
"The traffic controller is calling Victor Juliet your identity
I have lost in the violet storm communicate or squawk emergency"

Twenty credits to anyone who can tell me the name and artist.

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